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TAC 253

Posted on November 16, 2023June 15, 2022 by spiderdewey

Kill! Luke Ross & Dan Green are back so Luke can do his own Todd McFarlane Spider-Man instead of having Deodato do it (Better than him!), thank you very much. Well, Calypso sets the boys loose on each other again, as rewinding a little seems to be the thing to do these days, and then there’s a 2-page splash of them facing off, and then It’s Fightin’ Time. She tells them to fight until they’re both dead, which seems kinda hard to do. Outside of a “Superman and Doomsday both punch each other so hard they die at the exact same moment” situation, seems like one of them should live. I bet they both do, tho! It somehow takes another page of them squaring off before Spider-Man brains Baby Kraven with a rock.

Love people saying “Hades” in old comics. So natural. Personally, I feel like if you can’t print the word you want, you should rephrase entirely, but I seem to be in the minority. These days, it’s just tons of typewriter symbols. “$%#@!” It’s annoying and distracting and it sucks. Anyway, what’s Aunt Anna figured out?

Of course. Not a bad guess, tho. Things get less funny as she storms off saying MJ will learn the hard way, like she did. MJ is taken aback. Maybe we’ll learn why Mr. Watson was written out of the book, after all. Meanwhile, Gibbon and Grizzly are having their stupid Bearmobile hauled out of the drink, and then they hear an explosion and catch The White Rabbit Gang robbing a bank. I so don’t care. So don’t care.

Spider-Man does a page of internal turmoil and so on, then picks up a spear and chucks it into Calypso’s shoulder, shocking her drummers into stopping. Freed of the mind control, Spidey and Lil Kraven begin fighting the drummers so they can’t get back at it, and Spidey is sure to let us know in his internal monologue that the spear didn’t go very deep into Calypso’s shoulder, just enough to throw everyone off. That seems unlikely!

Some unusual-for-comics grownup problem solving! Good thing he didn’t shake her other hand, that’s the arm with the spear wound. I can’t recall if JM DeMatteis does anything else with this Kraven, but boy, you won’t believe what kind of dumb stuff he gets up to in the hands of other writers in the early 2000s. Well, anyway, we cut to that Mueller guy Norman was talking to last issue at Ravencroft. He’s told Kafka was fired (Did I miss that or just forget?), and they’re in chaos and transition, but Mueller doesn’t care about that, he says he just wants to see his patient. The guy showing him around says he didn’t even know someone was in this cell.

No idea who either of these guys is. Well, they obviously have beef with Spider-Man, and I’m sure we’ll learn all about it. Spider-Man arrives home and says hi to MJ, briefly tells her about his day. She says there’s some dinner left in the fridge, and he goes down to check that out, and guess who’s waitin’ for him?

Really, man? I was so ready to believe this awful garbage was over. Thrilled, even. Meanwhile, in the letters, the insane Man-Wolf guy from last issue is back, overjoyed that his dude showed up in TAC 248 (Did he? I forgot!). Remember how he was quitting Spider-Man forever? How’d he see the next issue? HMMMMMMM. Maybe he was.. Being insane and overdramatic! No, comics fans are notoriously levelheaded. Someone must’ve told him…

  • Aunt Anna
  • Calypso
  • Dan Green
  • Dr. Mueller
  • Grizzly
  • JM DeMatteis
  • John Kalisz
  • Kraven The Hunter
  • Luke Ross
  • Mary Jane Watson
  • Sir
  • Spectacular Spider-Man
  • Spider-Man
  • The Gibbon
  • White Rabbit
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