We’re back to the original recipe Spider-Man. This block contains 35 comics and only 4 issues of ASM. It’s feeling like the mid-90s all over again. But to start, strap in for one of the worst Spider-Man stories of all time, which is part of a big event that’s also pretty bad, for which all tie-ins didn’t… didn’t tie in too well. It’s such a mess I’m not even sure how to cover it. The pieces do not fit together. But, look, we have this fine Steve Epting cover. Epting was doing his thing in the 90s, with a long run on Avengers. I did not care for his work. I think maybe he doesn’t care for that period of his work, either. But that was a decade ago, and in the 2000s, he returns to Marvel with a completely new art style that is sleek and appealing, somehow very classic looking while perfectly suited to the “realism” trend of the moment at the same time. No small feat. And at this moment, he is either juuuust about to get the gig drawing Captain America, a historic run where he will co-create the Winter Soldier with Ed Brubaker, among other things, or he’s already working on it. So this cover was like a vision of things to come. Sadly, he does not provide interiors. Inside, it’s still Paul Jenkins, this month working with Michael Ryan on pencils and inks, and Studio F on colors as per usual. This storyline will have several artists, for some reason. This one opens with a full page of some guy imagining his life as a sitcom intro until he’s interrupted by a loud “MMMMMMMMMMM.” This is shown to be reverberating throughout the city, stopping everyone who hears it in their tracks.
Who’s that? She’s not on the next page, so we’ll have to wait to find out. We instead cut to Peter & MJ enjoying a quiet time at home when Peter goes to wash his hands. I don’t know why, he didn’t seem to be doing anything before. Anyway…
I don’t know a whole lot about Michale Ryan. Not a lot of personal experience. Pretty sure he drew a short stint on Runaways that I read. Kind of walking a line. Not in the cartoony camp, but not in the realism camp, either. Just sort of stylized. Well, elsewhere, Captain America is just standing on a roof when a SHIELD chopper appears to ask him for help. Then:
She’s not very nice. We then find Spider-Man swinging into the city, looking for the source of his headache, and Captain America parachuting in nearby, as people are rioting and acting crazy.
Oh, sure. Spider-Man, who is both friend and fan of Captain America, suddenly thinks he’s a loser…
And, naturally, Cap is a humorless government thug. Of course! This period of writers who just do not care about writing these characters correctly kills me. Up at the top of this building, a police copter swoops in to ask her what her deal is, and she makes it collapse in on itself and begin to plummet. It goes right by Spider-Man, who… does absolutely nothing. It somehow crashes into the side of the building and gets stuck there, and he doesn’t do anything! What a jerk! Cap is proceeding through the building, and he’s worried what’ll happen when Spider-Man reaches the mystery woman, which he just has.
“That reeks!” Much like this story!
The lady says Spider-Man is a survivor, and she likes that. Speaking of survivors, she tells him to think of her as the biggest cockroach he ever saw. Very appealing. Cap arrives and chucks his shield at her, but one of her drones jumps in the way.
So they know each other and she’s called Ana.
By this point, it’s hard to remember a time when Jenkins was considered a breath of fresh air on these books. He has long overstayed his welcome. And we’re just getting started, believe me. This story is insane.