That’s right, it says “Clone Saga” on the cover. Bendis, never one to shrink from a challenge, is taking on the worst Spider-Man stories ever. Or, you know, what had been the worst ever when this came out during Civil War. Can he do it? Can he filter the worst of the worst through the Ultimate magic and actually get something good out of it? Spoilers: He can. He so can! This one I remember being just insane, in a good way, and I’m excited to revisit it. John Sibal is helping John Dell with inks this issue, and Richard Isanove is back to coloring. I wonder why there’s so much swapping around in the colorist position. We begin with Peter on the phone with Kitty, and a sudden silence has just happened. Peter asks if she hung up, and then what’s wrong.
Man, this is just like MJ when Gwen moved into the house. Teen angst never changes. Next day, at school, MJ, who Isanove is inexplicably giving brown hair, talks to Peter, says his head’s not in the game, and takes him to “his favorite place,” which is, of course, the mall.
They look weird. I wonder if Bags was slipping on the schedule. Maybe that’s why the 2nd inker, who I have to assume is doing these pages. They look weird. Suddenly, chaos breaks loose at the mall, as someone starts tearing up the place. Peter takes the time to make MJ promise she’ll leave and then goes to suit up, as the fleeing mob makes a lady drop her baby. But then a web shoots out and grabs his official Spider-Man-themed shoe before he can hit the ground.
Hard to believe they got 97 issues without an Ultimate Scorpion. I mean, yes, in the more “grounded” world of this comic, a guy with a scary tail is perhaps silly, but so are a lot of things. We just saw the Kangaroo! Scorpion’s a Ditko design! But he’s here. And he’s…
…not all there, is what he is. Bags’ design looking a little more like a real scorpion is interesting, the tail going all the way up to the head in a sort of, well, scorpion shape. Well, that’s the cops showing, of course, and Scorpy turns and shoots them with some kinda goo from his wrists while yelling “die!,” and said goo coats their whole heads and looks unpleasant. Then he backhands Spider-Man through a wall to focus on the police. But Spidey’s right back, webbing him and slamming him into a column as the cops threaten to shoot both of them, only to be kicked into the converging police.
No Crooked Jeaeanenenne De Woooooooooooolffeee to keep the cops off his back anymore.
Clone saga! On the one hand, Ultimate Scorpion being a clone of Peter was kind of a bummer to me, since it all-but-certainly meant there wouldn’t really BE an Ultimate Scorpion. But on the other hand, nobody saw that coming, I can tell you that. We catch up with MJ, who really did run home and is telling her mom she’s safe. Then she goes to her room, where her hair is suddenly the usual red (?) and she is not alone!
And, we’re off. This story, as I recall, is a real out of control train, just getting crazier and crazier at breakneck speed. Next issue’s cover alone really ramps things up…