Notice how Spider-Man has a notch out of his elbow? What’s that all about? Yo, this comic smells bad, man. It has been stored improperly. The Ebay listing did not mention this. Ugh. People. Oh, it’s so much worse when you open it up. I didn’t think one could be worse than Giant-Size Spider-Man #1. Good God, I might have to throw this away. My eyes are watering. WHO’S READY FOR SOME FUN COMICS READING? The Answer is chasing some goons on the street for some reason. A flying supervillain has just stomped a group of goons to the ground, and one of them decides to pull a knife on him. There’s a reason these dudes are goons, you know? Smart guys don’t goon.
Well, that was a confusing conversation. We turn now to Peter Parker reading The Daily bugle, appreciating Black Cat’s photography with his name on it.
Mrs. Muggins thought she saw something moving “in the john!” She launches into another speech about Peter’s kinky girlfriend as he ushers her out of the room. It was the suit, of course. Peter thinks it surely couldn’t have been moving without him commanding it. Noooo, that would be WEIRD, right? He thinks about how Felicia only thinks of herself as Black Cat and him as Spider-Man and “I’m not sure I like that!” (uh doy), and as he gets into the suit and heads out, he decides he’s going to have to talk to her about going to all Peter Parker’s haunts looking for him. Seriously? That was 3 issues ago, dude. Why did you not talk about anything on that train ride??? We quickly look at 2 guys working in a morgue. One is bored, so the other says he’ll show him a crazy body… after lunch. This seems wild unprofessional, but too late, we jump to the home of The Black Cat, who wishes her Spider would just ditch his entire life so they could hop around on rooftops forever. A totally normal relationship!
Crrrrreepy! Spidey swings up, so The Answer decides to just chill out and watch them. Spidey wants to confront her about their various issues, but she dives out the window immediately so they can go flip around and stuff. He says they need to talk, so they do. He says he feels guilty about taking credit for her photos. Meanwhile…
I mean, finally. This relationship is toxic and terrible. It doesn’t really make sense to me that Peter randomly noticed, but at least he did. But he’s so worked up, he forgot how his new webshooters work, and tried to shoot a web the old way. Since the web comes out the back of his hand now, it just shoots pointlessly downward, and he almost falls to his death. That’s actually pretty funny.
The Answer is alarmed that BC & Spidey seem to have just broken up, and flies over to Kingpin’s house to inform him. Kingy is not happy.
When they finally tell us The Answer’s deal, there’s no way it can justify this weird, weird character. We cut to Felicia, who’s simmering down after the fight as she returns home, only to find The Answer in the living room. He’s here to call in the marker she owes The Kingpin for her powers. As he tells her his plan, we cut to Spidey swinging around brooding about the fight. Like, really brooding. Totally lost in thought.
We cut to Flash sneaking out of the house in the wee hours with that dufflebag again, Sha Shan begging to know what he’s doing, him refusing to answer. She decides to call Peter Parker to try to have him talk sense into Flash, but he’s not home. He’s swinging back to whup those guys stealing boxes. He realized later, you see. Then he webs up all the guys, puts them in the van, and drives them to the police station. That’s funny, but that doesn’t seem like admissible evidence. I dunno, I’m no lawyer. It looks more like he just kidnapped those guys.
She’s with The Answer, of course, who has the scenario depicted on the cover set up on the roof of the morgue. Save The Cat or stop the bomb. Then he just flies away. Spidey saves Felicia, of course, and the bomb explodes.
I feel like The Answer is like 2 seconds away from being Poochie. The Answer is glad to have forced Spidey & BC to reconcile, and he also accomplished his other mission, as we check in with those guys in the morgue again…
Is it graverobbing if you get the body before it gets to the grave? I don’t know. But, hey, we made it through another issue that didn’t cause any continuity problems, that’s nice. A timebomb is ticking, though. Anyway, why would Kingpin steal a corpse? The answer (THE ANSWER!) will baffle you!