It seems very weird that two in-demand Marvel artists like David Finch and Ron Garney were allowed to do a couple of random shorts in SMU, but here we are. They’re certainly why I picked up this issue, the last of the run that I bought. Well, that at Dr. Doom on the cover. The best villain in comics running into Spider-Man is always worth a look. The first story is drawn by Finch and written by CB Cebulski, who I think I have mentioned elsewhere. Current Marvel Editor-in-Chief as of this writing, the brief bio he provides on the credits page pretends he’s just starting out as a writer, because his pretending to be a Japanese guy named “Akira Yoshida” to write Marvel comics on the side of his editing gig had not yet been exposed. Wild stuff. Well, Cebulski’s story with Finch, Danny Miki and Frank D’Armata, the new Avengers art team, begins in a manner pretty typical of the period:
It’s weird that 2000s comics are more progressive in many ways, and really backslid on female representation. Cat is saying Spider-Man agreed to repay her for helping with that stupid Mark Millar business breaking Osborn out of jail, “no questions asked,” and this is it. An object in the Latverian embassy that could be very dangerous if it stays there is also a big payday for Felicia. This whole thing of her returning to the life of crime she basically never had in the first place is so jarring. More objectification follows as Spider-Man agrees to go with her, and still more as Felicia cuts a hole in a window into Doom’s bedroom. But, Dr. Doom is literally trapped in Hell at the moment, so he’s not liable to know. Felicia finds a secret elevator, there is more innuendo, and they’re on their way.
Terrible dialogue. It’s a good thing Cebulski’s mostly an editor. Spidey and the Cat fight Doom for 2 pages, Cat is able to pry his mask off, and then Spider-Man punches his fist right through Doom’s head. THEN he learns it was a robot. Which… certainly asks some questions about his technique. But, anyway, Doombot is down. Spider-Man makes two Star Wars references on the same page as Felicia gets into a safe. Spidey demands to know what was in it.
Here the book is interrupted by a bound-in, folded poster for some PS2 game. Almost as awkward as this conversation. And in case there wasn’t enough rampant horniness in the preceding 9 pages…
Ugh. Like, MJ was oversexualized by McFarlane and Larsen. Black Cat got the Mark Beachum treatment. But the dialogue being as pathetic as the pictures is new in 2000s comics. It’s even worse. Well, next up, we have Joe Reitman, some Hollywood person, writing for Ron Garney, Bill Reinhold and Matt Milla. Garney’s been on the blog before, but it was work from before his career-defining run on Captain America, where he really came into his own, and he got even better since then.
That guy turns out to be a member of the “Spider-Man Clean Up Crew,” dispatched to clean up after his fights in particular. That seems odd. Who’s on the, like, Moon Knight clean up crew? I assume they have a lot of time off.
We next see our guy cleaning up Spider-Man’s web, which dissolves, and one of Iceman’s ice slides, which would melt. Really making up work for yourself, buddy. Artie goes about his business, grousing to himself about how Spider-Man’s home must be a mess, and how he spends sometimes 12 hours a day cleaning up after the guy and never gets a thank you. And then, you just know it, he’s gonna get mugged going home from a bar after work, but guess who shows up?
I have always thought that, despite the obvious, clear differences in their work, Lee Weeks’ art style bore some surprising similarities to John Romita, Jr. And furthermore, that Ron Garney had a similar thing going with Lee Weeks. And thus the very Romita, Jr.-looking Spider-Man at the top of this page… makes a weird kind of sense to me.
Obviously, we’ll never see this weird little dude again. What a strange angle. Well, that’s that. And that’s that for this series, at least for me. This series ran one more issue, stopping at 15. But, say, did you like that 2nd art team? Enough to see them in action a lot more, very soon? I hope so!